“I read a lot of self-help books, but look at all the difference it’s made in my life!” Sarcasm noted. My friend was coming out of a dark melancholy of several years and complained that bringing something from your head into your life is hard. Another case of trying to keep it real.
People call what we do “word play.” Mouth flappers. Those of us whose actions can’t keep up with our mind-matters fend off judgement like OJ Simpson. We’re guilty alright but it’s not murder folks. Let’s get into the empty seats to applaud the performance of Good Intentions. Good intentions come in degrees. There’s the thought, the desire, and then the levels of action that happen before and until execution. Not all life is like playing horseshoes. There is “win” in process too.
But my friend’s real beef was with the expectation she had that those books and their words would marinate her. Soak her until she smelled and tasted and essentially became something new and better. She didn’t think they did. How does someone somehow bring what is out there inside?
If you want more about some of the biological play on this, read this post. Basically if you are trying to grow, you are most successful working with a growing-style that is congruent with your temperament. There are other intersecting paradigms also, including spirituality, external stressors and biology. Bringing it inside is a balance between paradigms in life.
If I were speaking to my friend though, I’d applaud her thoughts, desires and degrees of action that have constituted her journey of Good Intentions. I’d invite her into the stands with me and take some time to watch a replay of the parts of her life that made her glad. That in itself opens us up to what needs to come in. And we are more able to keep on.
Self Care Tip # 55 – Applaud. Be a friend to yourself.
Question: Do you ever lose yourself in processing? Tell me your story.
A few years ago I became obsessed with metacognition. I am still quite interested in the subject and regularly try to brake down other people’s way of processing when I meet them. However, when I get going on my own mind it can get a little bizarre and a lot involved. There is just no end to thinking about your potential and how it all comes together in your head. I challenge anyone to really consider “How can I take this in and keep it there?” without going temporarily and quietly insane. I lost two days of my life to that tangled mess of thought.
I really enjoyed this post (and the other’s that I’ve read thus far) and I agree. Watching someone actively and intentionally alter who they are in the name of “self betterment” is often difficult. It just doesn’t seem entirely genuine and rarely goes as smoothly as they would like. In the end, it often feels like they’re more concerned with convincing others that they have “grown” than having actually convinced themselves.
Hello Posky! Nice to “meet you” :). I was so happy to get your note, big words included. Thanks for reading and for the perks. I checked out your blog and …a bunch of time later and after many laughs and gasps, realized what a cool thing to have someone like u stop by. so thanks and please come again w your words and your mighty mind. Keep on!
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