There are not many people who can poop on me whom I will still want back. Today, sitting at Olive Garden I noticed some brown on my white linen pants. I thought, “Oh bummer, my soup spilled.”
Image by adactio via Flickr
The food was delicious. I love their salad and minestroni soup. Yum. People say that the Olive Garden salad is the healthy food that really isn’t healthy and I believe them. Especially because I always eat like it’s a challenge. As if this may be the last salad I’ll get for weeks or perhaps I’m being filmed and about to get a prize for eating so much salad.
We were there with family, including my nieces and parents. You may remember my youngest niece who was born premature and damaged, yet dominated the NICU at UCSD with her rapid developing health. Remember how loopy I am over the perfect white and soft nape of her neck? Well she is about one and a half years old now, weeble wobbles all over the place, and she loves me. She really loves me. I have thought that perhaps she may know something the rest of the bozos around are missing and I quietly congratulate her often.
Today, of course she wanted me. We sat and snuggled and she gave me the ultimate compliment of letting me feed her. After her third visit, and the fact that the brown spots on my pants kept reappearing, I finally let the truth sink in as well. I had been pooped on.
After three babies of my own, anyone would think I should have known better, or perhaps been less repulsed. But let me tell you thinkers. I was so grossed out. It was all of me not to lose my salad.
We all got cleaned up. Mostly of course. FYI – it’s not that easy to get poop out of linen in a public bathroom. I was given lots of space by everyone thereafter. Except from my niece. Yes. She was back. And yes. I wanted her.
Now, how to get a self-care nugget out of this? Bring a change of clothes wherever you go and let love come. Even when you get pooped on.
Of course she loves you!! And never mind the white linen..it is such a lovely memory colored by a bit of brown and lots of hugs!! 🙂
what a perspective – one to envy and emulate – smile
This post made me laugh so hard :). I don’t have kids of my own, but I have worked with a lot of kids (it’s what I went to school for). I have been pooped on, puked on, pee’d on, snotted on many of times. I don’t care what anyone says, I will NEVER get use to it. The gross factor is and will always there-lol.
ps. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the Olive Garden!!!!! All the Olive Garden’s were removed from Canada about 10 years ago :'(. I only get to eat it when we travel to Florida for vacation every year. I would say in the span of a 1 week vacation we will eat there about 3-4 times! YUM
u r a big sweetie purple! thank u for the shared laughs. so fun. and bummer – no olive garden. oh the losses in life. sigh.
Well, I love everything about this post. This is Sana at her finest. Beautiful writing, tone, word choice, humor, theme…everything. I enjoyed every second of reading this.
i am a-glow. u r a voice i treasure. thx sarah.
I have yet to be grossed out by my 3 1/2 yr old’s poop or snot…though I definitely wince at everyone else’s!! Strange how that happens…but ever so sweet! I loved your story!
re: Olive Garden salads…check/don’t check the salt content, depending. O.G. was my mother’s favorite until she had a TIA, found out she has heart issues and had to go on a 1500 mg daily salt diet. We’ve been sussing out restaurant menus ever since. She was horrified to find out that she had consumed over 7000 mg of salt on soup, salad and a couple of bread sticks the day before her TIA at OG…sorry to mention it, but in case you need to watch your salt intake…;-(
hey sandra! thx for sharing the sweet moment w us. babies. ahhh.
and bummer bout the salt count but especially the TIA. big hug to mom.
You’re funny, Doc 🙂
every now and then i enjoy a good snort.
Much of the time, when my kids are being complete and total hellions, the only way I can respond to maintain my sanity is to sit down with one of them and just hold them close and tell them how much I love them. Well, maybe not so much now that they are older, but when they were younger, it was helpful. 🙂
why does it always feel so good to hear about the suffering of other mothers at the mercy of their children? smile. thank u for commiserating. a good “oxytocin” hug is medicine. keep on.
That is too funny! At my job I had something I called the ‘three P’s.’ If any one of the three were present, I was out of there. They were poop, pee, and puke. As far as relationships go, I think I may be the one who’s done most of the ‘pooping.’ And it’s beyond me why my partner still loves me and keeps me around but I’m ever grateful for it. I have to add, though, that since I’ve become mentally and emotionally healthy, I’m starting to realize just how much I’ve been getting pooped on now and in the past. The difference now is that I deflect it back where it came from. Tee hee
tee hee. u rascal.
That’s Life Sana… It’s all about the poop 🙂 Sh** happens and it’s how we handle it that defines us! I have been pooped on before by my kids and I wouldn’t change it for the world 🙂 Have a wonderful day Sana!
“it’s how we handle it that defines us!” – sing out loud for the whole world. nice. thank u catherine.
Olive Garden here I come.
they probably have gotten a new shipment of lettuce in for your salad so i think you’re good.
Hi Dr. S, this post finds me. Yesterday, I felt my hubby was being mean to me. Well, he was mean, no feeling. He was rude, at home and in public. Even yelled at me. I felt pooped on. Today I asked him, well are you feeling better today? He said yes. I said good because yesterday you were mean. He looked at me and said what are you talking about. Just oblivious to his treatment. Again, I felt pooped on. What do I do? Let love come in and wipe off the poop. That gives Me peace…
thx determined. i like the way u said that – “finds me.” poetic and large. sorry bout the snubs from hubs. i’m getting a big smile thinking about your coping skills. way to go. keep talking.
LOL. 🙂 laugh laugh ha ha. so funny I’m rolling.
Really, I love the levels on this post.
OK, I get it. Let poop happen and love regardless.
thank you so much clar. i laughed again w u and had a blast. smile. just can’t get enough of that. nice “take-away” too. keep on.
Great attitude!