She died this morning. After a day and a night of confusion, stumbling gate, and suffering, our gentle gorgeous Maggie died. She is returning to carbon ash and giving us another reminder of what can be delivered to the living by death.
With the children taken to school, my husband came home to share grief with me. He had just listened to a podcast by Rob Bell about the word “new.” In Greek there are 2 common words used for “new.” One connects newness to Time. As in the young in age and old in age. This is traditionally how our culture interprets “new.” Another use of “new” uses the concept of renew without connecting it to time. There is a newness in you as you are in time. It’s a great overlap into the concept of presence. But where my big gratitude went out to was knowing how many opportunities to being made new we have.
Some of us have the propensity to wait until we “hit bottom” before we come looking to be made new. I don’t mean this in any way that is judgmental. Please see my blog posts on temperament if you want to read more about this. If we were fortunate enough not to have picked up any self sabotaging habits, then in some ways we’ve got an easier time of it as the the years roll by. However, few of us are, and getting crushed over and over again like recycling cans hurts a lot – us and ours.
“You can’t have it all” we are told, brewing panic after wasted opportunities. Not having it all, missing out on more days to share with Maggie, loosing the hope of puppies some day, brought the well-timed discussion about newness straight to our grief.
We are given the opportunity to be made new any time any where regardless. Any where from greatness to low-living, we have that choice. When I think of Maggie, I will think of this and hopefully I will choose to be made “new” again.
A “new” heart also will I give you, and a “new” spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you an heart of flesh.
Self Care Tip #50 – Be renewed. Be a friend to yourself.
Question: Do you agree? Disagree? Please tell me your story.