Everything starts and ends with Me ….Still talking about it

You make your own definitions of Me, self, and friendship. This is mine I share because it is friendly to Me. It is not meant to be a template.

I am the bride of Christ. When I speak of Me, I speak as one claimed by Love and in Love. When I speak of Me, I speak of this person I am in that complex union, dynamic and without lines. My self is the same as to say, Me with Christ and Christ with Me.

Using the term, Me, is a general term for that part that remains in each of us that is timeless, unchanged by trauma or indignity. The Me describes who you or I are still in any dimension or medical condition. The Me does not depend on a heart beat.

Being a friend to yourself means believing and treating yourself in ways that are consistent with your belief that although we are victimized in life, being the victim is a free choice. We are free to choose.

Out of this, our friendship grows to include the truth that we accountable to ourselves. We don’t look for nidus of control outside of our friend, Me.

Our friendship grows further to include presence with our personal journey, which in turn heightens our presence with what connections we share with others. These connections naturally require bank to generate and maintain and bank, as in any country, requires hard work. To serve others demands funds, even emotional and behavioral funds, physical funds and sociological.

Everything starts and ends with Me. (Refer to above.)

Question: What is your “Me, self, and friendship?” Please tell us. I’d love love to hear.

19 thoughts on “Everything starts and ends with Me ….Still talking about it

  1. I do not understand this article, and i suppose i should read the entire blog to get clues. Me is a fuzzy word. Me is the concept that most people have about themselves, which is usually different from reality. Friendship to ‘me’ has little to do with the ‘me’ concept. I have to feel good about being with the friend. Feeling good is beyond description, but it often means a lot of similarities and a similar way of thinking. Some people see friendship as fashion, a way to enlarge their me.

    • Hi Bert. Thank u for responding and thank u for responding to the question :). i’m glad. we’re still talking about this for a reason. the better we explore it, the more clearly we can say it to ourselves and others and it brings quality to our lives. I’ve thought often that when I can say things simply and clearly, that demonstrates understanding. still talking :). keep on.

  2. Me is the person who is messed up physically and emotionally and who is trying desperately – and unsuccessfully – to keep herself above the water of depression. SELF is the part of Me that is getting in the way of the healing Me needs. Friendship is the goal I have set to get Me and SELF on the same page.

    Example: We’re on vacation in DisneyWorld with the family. Me has been physically unwell with Fibromyalgia for about 18 years and emotionally unwell for many more years than 18 but this summer Me has been plagued by one infection after another and on way too many antibiotics. Being in DisneyWorld in this condition and on these drugs has put Me in a wheel chair which makes keeping up with the family easier. Logic says Me is 71 years old, has Fibromyalgia and is in a major flare due to the forth “super bug” e-coli UTI of the summer, and is on an antibiotic not meant for people over 60 and one which causes, among other things, tendonitis, so it is recommended that one on this antibiotic not do a lot of physical activity and to avoid sun.

    Right. Having spent how much up front for two weeks in the Happiest Place on Earth? Of course, we came. Of course, a wheel chair is appropriate. What’s the problem? SELF. I don’t look sick or disabled. Is my family wondering why I’m in a wheel chair? Are others wondering? SELF is wondering!!! Am I being a problem for the family? Should I have come? Should I just go home? Is pushing the wheel chair too hard on my husband or son-in-law? Should I be worried about the pain, the swelling, the rash, the dizziness, the flare? Should I even BE at this point?? Today my granddaughter and my son-in-law missed a ride that my daughter, husband and I got on because my son-in-law rushed to get in line and forgot that someone in a wheel chair can get on earlier through a handicap gate. We got separated. Daughter and son-in-law ended up in a major (though quiet) fight. SELF wanted to take the next plane home because SELF is in a wheel chair and it’s all her fault!!

    Friendship between Me and SELF would solve all of this. Me knows Me is disabled and can only do as much as she can to keep up. SELF cannot accept the fact that SELF is disabled and not a problem – THE problem – as far as family and friends are concerned. SELF hates Me and keeps going back – years, actually – through her mind trying to figure out how on earth SELF got this way. Me is longing for a friendship with SELF that, at this point and at this time, is eluding her. Very depressed. Very down. Very, very happy to see responses from Dr. Q this morning finally!!! They make Me feel heard and being heard is so incredibly important!! Thank you, Dr. Q.

    Too long again…but I guess that’s SELF talking, isn’t it. Or is it?

  3. Yet another remark … something to think about when using personal pronouns: Me is the objectified 1st person. Things happen to me. I is the subjectified 1st person, I is being and doing things. Changing me into i means that on the subconscious level, i change from undergoing to actively creating life.

  4. I guess that according to bert0001 I didn’t do well at explaining Me, self and friendship. I come at this blog from a much more emotional place, I think. I’m not sure I know what the point of this blog is anymore. Makes me sad. I’ll miss it.

    • I’m not understanding why I got no response to this comment or the one I made above. It’s been a long time since i wrote either and I’m feeling much better physically and emotionally, but the lack of response still bothers – worries?? – me. I truly am concerned, sometimes, about what is happening to this blog. It’s gotten a bit too complicated for this non-tech old lady, I guess. I wish….well, I don’t know what I wish. I just miss the simplicity that was friendtoyourself. I’m happy for your successes, though, Sana. I’m just finding it hard to keep up with you.

  5. It is ALL on me. Took mother to hosp Thur for gastro-intestinal pain ,excretory blockage. She has stage 4 cancer malignant tumor spread to liver advanced. Quite a surprise as no prior indications. She’s 88, tiny and frail(85 pounds) so think chemo counterproductive as only very few months remain. My parents have lived with me last 10 years and have no brothers and sisters or other family except a daughter here and a son out of state but neither would be of much help. So it is finally my time to deal with and manage parentaly death. It’s on me. The only thing I pray for is stamina.

  6. Pingback: Freedom of Choice – Victim vs. Survivor « A Beautiful Mess

    • I’m really glad that you are finding a way to work through this. I know that it’s a tough enough personal battle to get through what you’re facing. Having a patient with any kind of an attitude (stubborn Sicilian – or, in my case, Swedish – stock) makes it all the more challenging. Strangely enough, though, I found that the harder it got, the stronger I got…and the more my mother seemed to realize that I really was okay and that she really did love me! She actually asked me, toward the end, how I learned to take care of people. Made me smile…through the tears. Hang in there, my hospice nurse friend. Sending thoughts and prayers daily.

    • I bet u r standing w presence, connected and w deep spirit. blessed, all of u, in your journey. We r also, because of your community. Thk u. How scared we all are to b in your place. Any words for us who r afraid to die? Or lose loved ones? Or become caregivers of dying? Keep on

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