Self-Care Tip #123 <–> Take care of yourself.
Before I was found by my man, my brother Vance Johnson used to tell me, “Become the woman whom the kind of man you hope to marry some day would want.” It was one more thing that helped keep my focus off of searching for boyfun-friends and on to living my life.
Of course it doesn’t end when we get what we want. When we stop growing, we stop living – as Sarah said in the blog-post, “You Are Enough.” Regardless of where we are in life, we are responsible for being the person that the people we want in our life want to be with.
Many of us deteriorate under the guise of service, employment, obligation, parenting, care-giving or whatever reason. We neglect ourselves and then give that battered up self to our hopes and to the people we love.
Don’t be misled. If asked, those very people we are serving would say, “Just take care of yourself.” If you don’t believe it, reverse it. What do you want to say to the over-extended people you love?
Jennifer who is a stay at home mom, tells me that she feels so guilty when she takes time to go for a run. She laughs, saying her husband wants her to go. He comes home and tells her, “Go! I’ll watch the kids.” Yet she still feels bad. She thinks about her husband’s long day at work and the kids moods, their needs, what she could do for them, and she can barely force herself to leave. Once she does, she says she always feels great about herself and them, and comes home having more than she did before to offer.
Taking care of ourselves, is giving the best gift to the people we love. “Me.” Taking care of ourselves might be the most selfless thing we could do. It keeps us connected to our life journey, which by definition includes keeping us connected to the very people we love.
Keep on!
Question: Where are you in your journey? Taking care of yourself, connected, disconnected? How does it affect those you love? Please tell me your story.
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- The Giving Tree Syndrome (psychologytoday.com)
Please thank Vance for me, I will pass that tenet on to my daughter.
Peace to you on Sunday, Doc.
I hope Jennifer is running as I type this.
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i can’t imagine how terrifying raising a pre-teen must be. how did our parents do it??!! Please let me know how it goes w this one. you shall be my prototype run :). thanks for commenting. i’ll tell vance and see if any more pearls fall out for me to catch.
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After nearly 12 years of dealing with anger, depression, loneliness, anxiety, etc. due to becoming disabled, I just recently started Therapy so I am just starting my journey to start taking care of myself. My family has been affected by living with me all these years as I have battled those issues, and thankfully they have all stood by me and supported me as best they can. I am in Therapy obviously to help myself, but more importantly to help them so that I can become the person I was before I got disabled.
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Dude, if I may say so, you are becoming much more than the person you were before.
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Thank you so much for saying this Zahara. You nailed it.
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I’m w Zahara on this! Keep on mr. courage.
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Hello, Sana, love this post. Doing things for ourselves is doing something for our loved ones. I am raising a teenager and maintaining a long-distance relationship and going to school full-time. I hope I am an inspiration to my son. Also, physical exercise actually gives me (everyone) more energy, it’s like charging the batteries. And it keeps us happy and balanced, (for the most part) which is a good way to be when you’re a parent, student, mate,etc. Have a nice day.
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Hey Zahara! Thank you for commenting and sharing some of your story. People need to hear you. Your son is learning in concious and subconsious ways about life and you are leading him well. Keep on!
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