Day # three. Say it out loud.

I like my short hair.

My hair has been long since I was round eight years old and I miled, by way of identity, with that dark healthy slightly curly low maintenance face-frame. Life yuck and plain old dying processes turned a few strands gray.

My tendency to anticipate the impact of loss on myself and my relationships, it’s been a while now that I’ve wondered and wanted over aging on Me. In my effort to toward myself into the inevitable rather than be taken by it, I cut my hair.

That may or may not make sense to you, but when I went home and spread the shorn trusses that used to be part of me out around trees and dirt, I liked myself a little more.

Day three of our, Say It Out Loud, challenge is here. Come and say what you like. Say what you delight in, in you.

Say it out loud.

Designed to Stand But Not Alone – Day 2, Say It Out Loud

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20091101 – TouchGraph friend graph (normal) (Photo credit: Rev. Xanatos Satanicos Bombasticos (ClintJCL))

Hello Friends.

Yesterday, hearing your voices was like drinking a green tea soy latte, no sweetener, extra matcha, with a scoop of protein!  Your courage to say what you like and are grateful for about yourselves out loud is supportive, inspiring and necessary for the well-being of those around. We are all designed to stand, to be accountable to self, to start and end with Me, but not alone.

Sometimes when I’m in the middle of a work-out, the urge to pack up and go fork into a greasy breakfast is almost overwhelming.  Looking around contemplating my escape, I see the Kaia-girls.  I would never make it without them.  Never!  (Arg!  She’s still here!?!  Dang-her!~  Maybe if she knows I’m going to Denny’s, she’ll leave too…?  Alright.  I’ll stay!  Darn it!)

Yes, designed for community, saying it out loud is friendly to Me.

Please join us in day #2 of our, Say It Out Loud, challenge!

Throughout the next two days, when you think of something(s) you like & are grateful for about yourself, say it out loud to us.

I’ll start!

I like my increasing Kaia-girl self-value.
Say It Out Loud.

Say It Out Loud. Three Day Challenge.

Hello friends. Please join us at Friend to Yourself in a three day, “Say it Out Loud,” challenge.

Throughout the next three days, whenever you think of something you like & are grateful for about yourself, say it out loud to us.

I’ll start! 😉

I like my body.

Say It Out Loud.

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Tension between camps

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We all have our pet beliefs we collar, “Reality.”

How do we get these? Through our perceptions, built on the foundation of sensory input, such as, sight, hearing, smell, touch, taste, emotion and logic we construct our real world.

Reality is different of course than Truth.  Anything higher than a rutting pig, (Snort! Snuffle!) will say that our reality changes as we grow, as we perceive differently.  That is to say, as we sense otherwise.

Anyone less primitive than a grub, (Munch! Wiggle!) volunteers limitations to our knowledge.  Or else we imagine Truth to be as small as the profound brilliance of our vision.

When one camp of knowledge responds to the natural tension any of us feel when opposed with the cliff wall of the unknown, how to respond?
I’m thinking

  • teen v. parent,
  • church v. science,
  • medication therapy v. homeopathic remedies,
  • to eat off of the floor v. trash what is there,
  • and whatever other contrast you and I contend with in our perceived real worlds,

we have a time, like a stone in a stream we stand on, before we pivot and move into the current.

What do we do while in that place of tension? Do we fight for what we know is right, wielding word, fist and spit in right-ness, or righteousness expected? (Watch it! Here comes a tomato!) How do we respond to the tension between what our senses have built for us and the rightness of the sensory construction of another’s reality?

(Look out! Some mud just splattered in my eye! Well that’s one way of getting to the next stone.)
Or… We could try inspecting the architecture of our beliefs, ask our own Me, “Where is the conflict?” “How did the wall get built?” Then go toward it with the humility that comes from knowing we are at least above a garden grub, if not far, in how we perceive the world around us.

We have a point when we can argue with others or we can look inside ourselves and say, “This is our tension.” “This is coming from the way I perceive things.” “This is about Me.”

One more time, we can go home to Me, where everything starts and finishes.  It’s not very nice if we don’t, to Me.  Because in the process of starting elsewhere than home, we miss the freedom, the presence, and the place of change.  That’s where the tension is, the place of change.

Question:  How does reviewing your sensory input improve your ownership of your reality?  How does owning your reality improve your friendship with yourself?  Please tell us your story.

Self-Care Tip:  Own our reality.

Unrequited Love of Me

tony

tony (Photo credit: Foxtongue)

A broken heart is.  Colors left behind give clues to whom was involved.

Wanda worked hard at her friendship.  She went into it with optimism.  She had chosen deliberately to do this, the steps toward taking care of herself. Taking these steps, like climbing a fine promise, notarized contract in hand.  She had the confidence of one who has turned aside from indenturehood to property.

Did Wanda get what she thought she would?

Miles was a good-looking man with nicely aged skin, obvious strength anyone noticed in his muscled limbs, and grooves more than wrinkles on his intense face.  He never lacked expression.  He was intense.  And it was with this body and emotion that he went into his relationship with Sara.

Did Miles get what he thought he would?

The most intimate exchanges, the most elemental, the very basic level of love to Me, you or any other is disappointing when it is a negotiation.  We will never get back what we gave for.  Relationships are never satisfying when they are mercantile, even with Me.

Question:  How do you get out of a mercantile relationship with yourself?  How do you give in friendship to “Me” without defined parameters of what you will get back?  When you do, what has happened in your relationship with “Me?”

Self-Care Tip:  Grow friendship with yourself as a lover not a merchant.

Related Posts:

Be as Good To Yourself As You Want Your Loved Ones to Be to Themselves

What Comes To Me From Others Is a Gift

Connecting to Others is a Condition of Freedom Rather Than Loss of It.

Why Not Skip Medication and Go Naturallllllll?!

The little Train

The train was tarnished from soot.  The engineer, Jack, grimaced over the craft, while he hauled wood into the fiery oven hidden in her belly.  She was a steam engine and her whistle sounded through the air like a shiver breaking ice.

Indians watched from a bouldered distant peak.  They saw the smoke and marked its passage with each puff.

Just then, a mischievous current sucked up that chimney-spew like a genie to her lamp and the loud wind masked the sound of her turning wheels.  To the unfamiliar natives looking on, the tiny far off train appeared to have stopped, silent to them now and no smoke to ribbon the air.

Not so, though.  Jack did not know they were watched, he and his steely lady.  He did not know he was described in the mind’s of others.

Moving.  Not moving.  Progressing.  Stopped.

But the sensory descriptors were misleading.

Music please.  (Perhaps tom-tom pow wow drums.)

As in this tidy little parable, we think that when we get relief from symptoms, it means that the disease process is better.

Anxious?  Have a beer and vuala!  Better.  Can’t sleep?  Smoke some weed and, “Aaaah.”

No?  “Of course not!” we say.  “We don’t do those plebeian substances.  We use our medications as prescribed.  We don’t abuuuuse them.  If we need more, we ask for more.”

This dialogue is usually regarding benzodiazepines.  “Doctor, I can’t take antidepressants or those other meds!  Why is everyone always pushing drugs on me?  I’m just taking klonopin.”  Or, “Doctors over-prescribe!  I just need xanax!”

Brain disease runs something like the steam engine train.

The steam coming out of the chimney is what we see in symptoms, such as, anxiety, inner tension, fear, insomnia, irritability and so forth.  Get rid of the smoke and we think the disease is dealt with.  However, the train is still going.  The disease is still progressing, although not as notably disruptive as before.  To stop the train, we must stop the engine, or the disease process.  I’m not saying we must cure the disease, rather, just slow or stop the disease progress to treat it effectively.

Our goal is more than symptom management.  Our goal is to treat the underlying illness to preserve brain health and prevent against further injury.

Self-Care Tip:  When medically indicated, consider medical therapy.

Question:  When your symptoms improve, how do you continue toward treatment goals?  How do you go past getting “better” to full treatment?  Please tell us your story.