you are where I go when I go home

grass stains on my knees, I return,…

I chewed despite the sensory scream to stop.  Stale ak-mak crackers.  Not much can compare.  These usually wonderful “sesame crackers made with organically grown ‘Whole of the Wheat’ flour stone ground crackers,” which my children love to eat like bread in peanut butter sandwiches, or like chips with guacamole, had been opened and left unsealed in the dark of our pantry.  What happens to crackers without preservatives?  Most of our packaged foods are preserved to last until Jesus comes, but not ak-mak.  They are good for about thirty minutes.  That is exaggerating it, but you see.  They are lovely and healthy and like a smile on any face, best served fresh.

Why did I chew on?  They were sucking up the saliva in my mouth faster than the spigot would allow.  I chewed, insisting the memory of ak-mak experiences would triumph over the current reality.

Exploring ideas about God and self-care has been sometimes fresh and sometimes not.  She is a smile that jumps on the face before the thought even comes out in words.  He is the energy we awaken with after depression lifts.  She is the space on Mother’s lap.  A sun-dress in a California winter.  He is not forgotten, oxidized, or dry supplement.  This I know.  So when the thoughts and the words contradict this Truth, I spit it out.  Or I hope to.  None of us need that.  But if I don’t spit it out, if I chew even after it is obvious to the rest of you, “Time to spit!,” would you, in your generous hearts, please pull the kindness forth and call it?  Stale.

This poem is my current humble effort toward speaking about God.

you are where I go when I go home

grass stains on my knees, I return…

More to come from poetry and thoughts on God and self-care.  How does God intersect with your self-care?  Please engage and speak.  We are designed for community and need you.  Keep on!

Dr. Q