“I’m doing really well!” Gene said, and he proceeded to tell me just how well things were going for him.
Gene, a father of three, a husband, and employed full-time, had a life marked by chronic worry and intermittent bouts of depression, occasionally punctuated by panic attacks. We had been working together for several years. During that time, he had experienced some periods of stability.
I was glad to hear how well Gene was doing: exercising regularly, sleeping through the night, performing well both at home and at work, and feeling more agency in his life.
Wonderful, right? Stability is a good thing. But what wasn’t so wonderful was the cycle Gene often found himself in—swinging from severe anxiety to depression, to anxious depression, to what he believed were symptoms of ADHD, and back to anxiety again, a bird in flight without a compass. This pattern played out between his visits. He would come to the clinic one day looking like a shiny penny, only to return in crisis during the next follow-up. Why was he stuck in this cycle? Maybe it was biological—or maybe not. One thing, however, was certain: Gene had a recurring habit of self-sabotage. He loved to self-adjust his medications.
During this particular clinic visit, Gene rushed through his medication list, likely sensing that I wouldn’t be as pleased with him as I was when he had shared his successes at the beginning of our appointment. I noticed him fidgeting as we talked, his eyes darting right, then left. That’s when I knew—without him even saying it—that he had altered his medications again. On his own.
Have you ever been in a relationship with someone you cared about, where their behavior forced you into a confrontation you never wanted to have? Like a friend who drank too much at every dinner party, leaving you no choice but to say, “You have a drinking problem.” Or a child who spent more of your money than agreed upon, and even though you could afford it, you knew it wasn’t good for them, so you had to say, “I can’t give you money anymore.” And it leaves you feeling gutted. You’d much rather be the “Yes-man,” the generous one, rather than the uptight enforcer. You feel misunderstood, even a little resentful, that you were in essence pressed up against the wall without anywhere else to go but into the confrontation. No one thinks about how hard it is for you to have to say “No,” in whatever fashion the situation called for. No one considered that is not something you ever wanted to do. “I don’t want to be this person!”
When someone in your personal life behaves in a way that forces you into uncomfortable confrontations or makes you feel cornered into addressing issues you’d rather avoid, it’s often described as emotional manipulation or manipulative behavior.
This can also be seen as a form of boundary pushing or boundary testing, where the person knowingly or unknowingly disregards your limits, forcing you into a position where you must enforce your boundaries, even if it’s uncomfortable for you. Sometimes, this is referred to as being emotionally strong-armed or coerced into conflict. These situations can make you feel trapped into playing the “bad guy” role, despite your best intentions.
Gene was doing a form of this in our clinical relationship. He’d be in a crisis, call me and I’d see him, reactively rather than proactively. Then Gene would go and play around with his medication dosages and/or stop or start other medications he had at home at will.
This behavior, where a patient adjusts or changes their medication regimen without consulting their healthcare provider, is called medication nonadherence. More specifically, when patients alter their dosage, skip medications, or stop taking them entirely based on their own judgment, it’s often referred to as self-medication or self-adjustment of treatment.
This behavior can undermine the effectiveness of the treatment and lead to unstable health outcomes, as seen with Gene, where it contributed to his ongoing cycle of anxiety and depression.
“Gene”, I said. “As we’ve discussed many times before, I can’t continue in a patient-doctor relationship with you like this because it’s not good for you. In essence, you are treating me like a dealer. We are not a team.” I did not want to say it but had to. “Gene, if you do this again, we’ll have to terminate our work together.”
Gah! I hate doing that!@#@#^&*%^&*(!!!
There are so many reasons patients do this and it’s not something to be ashamed about. See this post, A Tiffany Diamond Isn’t This Good, to go over reasons for treatment nonadherence. It’s so common that it’s almost normal, but it doesn’t carry a moral value. That’s not to say that it’s not hard on the medical providers, nor harmful to the patient and that’s why it is better to deal with it upfront rather than let it go on and on and on.
Confronting a patient about treatment nonadherence can lead to several positive outcomes, both for the patient and the therapeutic relationship. Here are some key benefits:
- Improved Understanding: By addressing the issue, you can help the patient understand why sticking to the prescribed treatment plan is critical for their health. It opens the door for education about the risks of self-adjustment and the benefits of adherence.
- Strengthened Trust and Communication: Having an open and honest conversation builds trust. It shows the patient that you’re not just a prescriber but a partner in their care. When patients feel heard and understood, they are more likely to be honest about their struggles, leading to better outcomes.
- Identifying Barriers: Confronting nonadherence can reveal why the patient is making these changes—whether it’s due to side effects, misunderstanding, financial issues, or other personal reasons. This insight allows you to address those barriers and adjust the treatment plan if needed.
- Tailored Treatment: If the patient feels the medication isn’t working or is causing problems, discussing it allows you to collaboratively adjust the treatment plan in a safe and effective way. This can make the patient feel more in control while ensuring their health is prioritized.
- Prevention of Future Health Complications: Addressing nonadherence early can prevent the patient’s condition from worsening. This proactive approach can reduce the likelihood of unnecessary health crises or hospitalizations.
- Patient Empowerment: Confronting the issue respectfully and collaboratively can empower the patient to take an active role in their treatment. This can lead to greater self-awareness and better long-term adherence to medical advice.
By having this conversation, the clinician and patient create space for a more individualized approach that acknowledges the patient’s concerns while ensuring their safety and well-being.
Self-Care Tip: Work together with your treatment providers! Be a team :). Keep on!
Questions: What are good reasons you’ve found for treatment nonadherence? We need to hear!
