Soaking him in

Evening friends. Or morning. Spent the day today and will tomorrow being present with the father of my children. Can’t give what we don’t have and I’m thankful, humbly, to say that I have love for him. That’s currency of sorts I suppose. There have been sad times for us when I didn’t have bank.
What has being a friend to yourself invested in you? Do you find love there? You were made for it. Blessings! ūüôā
Self-Care Tip # I can’t remember! – Give to yourself love and friendship and you will find love and friendship where it dwells.

The Pleasure That Should Be Ours In Emotional Health

Cup of coffee with whipped cream

Image via Wikipedia

Some time, I’d like to come back to our bullying series as there is still some help to be had for us. ¬†However, today, my cherubs are asleep and it’s only seven PM. ¬†My feet are up. ¬†I’m sitting by lots of beauty colored in varied hues of sunset, shadow and dusk. ¬†Tonight will be short. ¬†I will let today end and indulge the coming together of these things. ¬†(I am even drinking reheated coffee with lots of whipped cream!)

What I have thought of to share with you my friends, as I’ve enjoyed its friendly work on me today, is the pleasure that should be ours in emotional health.

Bad things will come. ¬†We will have anger, lower communication and such. ¬†We will wish we hadn’t pushed the call button on the phone by accident when yelling. ¬†BUT. ¬†But (“Mommy you said a potty word!”). ¬†But it will pass. ¬†It will not define our day or our perception of self. ¬†We won’t¬†catastrophize and we will trust ourselves to show love and mercy to Me in our weakness. ¬†This is a pleasure to experience. ¬†This is what comes when we have brain health.

If this is what has always been your reality, well great. ¬†BUT. ¬†But (“Mommy! ¬†Why did you say that?). ¬†But, many of us know what it is to crave for days when we can say that the blow-ups, outs and ins don’t blot out the sun. ¬†They shouldn’t. ¬†The pleasure comes with health. ¬†Go for it! ¬†You are worth it. ¬†You were made to feel pleasure.

Questions: ¬†When was it that you realized that your emotions and behaviors didn’t rule you or someone you love any more? ¬†What did/does that mean to you? ¬†Please tell me your story.

(Ah!  There goes the last of the sun and the trees are now silhouettes.)

Self-Care Tip #257 – Go for the pleasure of trusting yourself to respond with healthy emotions and behaviors.

Remember Love to Feel Bigger Than Your Self

A Mothers Love. The Hand of a Child.

Image by Steve Rhode via Flickr

Self-Care Tip #175 – Remember Love.

Yesterday was my son’s birthday and today we partied over him.

How old are you?

He looks at his fingers and sees how many come up before he answers,

Four. ¬†I’m four!

Right now, he feels really big. ¬†He blows his lid if anyone says otherwise. ¬†And because he’s never been above the bottom twentieth percentile on the growth curve, and because he’s four years old and the youngest of three, and because he’s so small, when he says, “I’m big!” looking serious over, yet under you with his bottle cap eyes, it’s really hard to keep straight. ¬†But more often I do …until he loudly says,

I love you the whole day, Mommy!  The whole day!  You are my friend!

Then it’s over for me. ¬†I can’t stay off of him. ¬†He’s just too beautiful. ¬†His open forwardness humbles me and I remember that it’s Love that makes us great. ¬†It’s Love that brings us to our knees. ¬†It’s Love, more than this stack of years, inches and knowledge that makes my son bigger than me when I forget Love. ¬†He doesn’t. ¬†He’s just too small to. ¬†Four years of Love is big.

Questions:  What has helped you remember Love lately?  What has made you feel bigger than your own self?  Please tell me your story.

The Biopsychosocial-How-to Be a Friend to Yourself

Marine of the United States Marine Corps runs ...

Image via Wikipedia

There is interplay between biological, psychological, and social issues that make us who we are.  You can work as a team not only  with your family, physicians, therapists, and whomever else is involved in your team approach to getting friendly with yourself Рbut you can also team up with yourself so to speak.


1.  Biology

Anything going on materially with my physical body?

Medical illnesses, temperament, sleep issues, diet, exercise, air, rash….

2.  Psychological

i.e., thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.

Things like lack of self-control, coping skills, catastrophizing, and negative thinking.

3.  Social

Such as socioeconomic status, culture, poverty, technology, and religion can influence health.

Think God, friends, marriage, parenting, work, unemployment….

We can do this not only with others who are here to help us, but also in our own thoughts. ¬†We can start seeing ourselves as more than one part or another. ¬†Separate and disconnected. ¬†This might take some practice or it might be natural for you. ¬†Just start wherever you are and run this through yourself. ¬†When you’re stressed, break it down. ¬†Take it apart to bring it back together.

Read more about this at¬†“Forget About Divisions In Knowledge.”

Question:  How do you see the connections within yourself?  How has this played into your healing processes?  Please tell me your story.

Self-Care Tip #125 РSee yourself as parts that make up your whole.  Be a friend to yourself.